A Copywriter’s Blog
A Holiday for Us All

I was originally going to post about how vehemently I despise Valentine’s Day. How despite the fact that I’ve been dating, engaged, or married to the same woman for the last 8 years, I still remember a winged baby’s mocking laughter from my “single” days. But then I realized I was looking at this all wrong.


All holidays are exclusive to some degree. Halloween clearly targets the younger crowd (half the houses I trick-or-treat at won’t even give me candy anymore). Christmas leaves the Jews with nothing to do but eat Chinese food and watch movies. Everyone loves St Patty’s- unless you’re a recovering alcoholic.

But Valentine’s Day, now there’s a holiday in which all have an equal share:

Singles are miserable because they’re single.

Dating guys are pissed because they’re forced to exchange their February paycheck for a gift whose price soars higher in direct relation to the amount of red paint on it.

Dating girls are doomed to disappointment because, no matter how hard they try not to, they will always secretly hope that their man will have something planned for them beyond their wildest dreams. (They will not)

Even the “genuine” guys are bitter this day. Because the most honest, heartfelt gift will still come across as a mere sacrifice to Cupid, as opposed to a spontaneous gesture of love.

So I rescind my bitter view of St Valentine, and his aforementioned day. Instead, I doff my cap and spend my money in recognition of this most impressive achievement: a holiday that all people can truly share. Indeed, Febuary 14th fulfills it’s intention far beyond his (and Hallmark’s) wildest dreams.

It’s an occasion for us all to get screwed.

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One Response to “A Holiday for Us All”

  1.   BrokenJPG » Blog Archive » A bHoliday/b for Us All | Says:

    [...] BrokenJPG » Blog Archive » A bHoliday/b for Us All [...]